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If you’re wanting more intimacy in your marriage, it’s important to have shared goals.


When you share goals, you agree on the most important things that you want for each other and for your marriage as a team. This creates emotional intimacy which leads to physical intimacy.  Having effective communication and knowing how to resolve conflict will support you in creating shared goals.


I watch firsthand the breakdown of relationships as couples stop planning together, and communicating together and in time it’s too far to come back from.


To help your marriage get stronger, work together to discuss your shared goals. These will help you talk about issues that are important to you both and open up opportunities for dreaming about your future together.


Types of shared goals: 





Write down your individual thoughts so you can get some independent clarity about what you want as an individual. For example:

  1. Where and/or how do you want to live in the next six months, two years, five years and 10 years?
  2. What are your individual career and life goals in the next six months, two years, five years, and 10 years?
  3. What do you see in terms of your family (kids/parents/etc.) in the next six months, two years, five years and 10 years?
  4. What do you want the most from your marriage?


Couple Discussion


Take turns to share your individual thoughts with each other and discuss them together. Keep the following in mind:


Commit to shared goals that feel exciting and invigorating.


  1. Write a list of the goals you both share. Put your list somewhere you can both see it.
  2. Make a plan to start achieving goals. For example, if you share the goal to go to Europe, create a plan and a budget. Then start working towards it.
  3. Celebrate shared goals when you meet them. Even if all you do is cross a goal off the list together, at least do a little happy dance to share the moment and revel in your togetherness.
  4. Schedule your next Shared Goals Meeting. Goals evolve and change over time. Set aside time every month ideally to revisit the shared goals exercise.


If you’ve lost your spark and are feeling disconnected and frustrated about the state of your relationship, but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, then opening up the conversation is crucial.

Perhaps Counselling & Coaching you are not ready for. Welcome to Ignite. A 6-week online program designed to help you build a happier, healthier marriage and relationship filled with passion, desire, and fun.

This platform will help reignite your spark and keep the fire burning for many years to come. You will learn about communication, conflict resolution and intimacy to build a stronger, more connected marriage. Launching in March 2023.


Listen to the Podcast on this topic – Podcast 112 Goal Setting in Marriage is Essential


Are you ready for Relationship Coaching? Head straight to the Relationship Coaching page


Or read this article – https://powerofchange.com.au/map-your-marriage/