The 9 Most Common Marriage Problems
1. Deficient communication
Communication is a verbal and nonverbal exchange of information that requires a response. Because it takes more than one person to communicate, it’s focused on a connection between people where it’s safe to openly share ideas and information free of judgment.
When partners are unable to communicate clearly, it’s easy for them to fall into a habitual way of ineffectively speaking to one another. What’s worse is that if poor communication skills are not dealt with, it’s possible for more serious problems to arise.
Fix it: Couples should learn how to communicate with one another to keep their love life on track and prevent these unnecessary issues.
2. Sex Life is struggling
While there are many reasons why couples lose interest in sexual intimacy or struggle with physical affection, it’s important for couples to find ways to keep their sex life fresh and fulfilling.
Sex may seem like a small piece of the marriage puzzle, but it’s actually rare to have a healthy relationship without it.
Unfortunately, there’s a vicious cycle when it comes to sex: It’s hard to want to have it when you feel emotionally detached, but it’s hard to feel emotionally attached without physical intimacy.
Fix it: To get past dry spell couples need to identify problem areas in their marriage and work through them to become physically comfortable with each other again.
3. Disregarding boundaries
Trying to change your partner is a personal invasion, and when it happens, the victimised partner will feel disrespected, hurt, or even angry.
Often times, overstepping someone’s personal boundaries is done intentionally, with a mission in mind. This type of behaviour stomps on the very idea of mutual respect, and the end result will likely be revengeful or withdrawal from the attacked partner. It’s hard to feel love, and be open with one another.
It’s also possible to unintentionally overstep personal boundaries, especially if this happens while genuinely trying to help your spouse.
Fix it: To avoid invasion, know where to draw the line when it comes to pushing for change.
4. Emotional infidelity
As unfortunate as it may be, once couples get married, it’s not uncommon for them to become emotionally disconnected from one another. When this happens, it’s likely that at least one partner’s needs will become unmet, and so they may start looking elsewhere to feel fulfilled. This is where emotional “infidelity” has the opportunity to slip into the marriage.
Some people feel that emotional infidelity is worse than physical cheating because it’s about more than just sex; it’s about connecting with another person on an intimate level.
Fix it: Couples must be clear on what they both consider cheating to be. Initially, partners may not have the same feelings towards what does and doesn’t count as cheating, but getting on the same page will lessen the chances of them allowing it to happen.
5. Fighting about money
When couples bond, it’s common for their bank accounts to follow suit. While this may not always be the case, even married couples that decide to keep their finances separate still face issues when it comes to money.
Discussing finances with your partner can be stressful and tense, especially if the couple has different spending habits or ways of managing money. In these types of edgy situations, it’s common for the conversation to become less about money and more about personal values and habits.
Fix it: To avoid this issue, be sure that you and your spouse are on the same page when it comes to dollars and cents. Make a financial plan together and skip any unnecessary disagreements by staying focused
6. Declining appreciation for one another
When appreciation between married partners decreases, conflict tends to rise.
Since both men and women crave positive recognition, when partners stop acknowledging one another’s efforts or fail to express gratitude for loving gestures, it’s likely their partner will stop doing those once appreciated actions. When this happens, couples tend to become bitter or agitated with one another.
Fix it: When those once small, yet loving unexpected gestures become expected, they lose their magic and become a chore rather than a choice. Whether you’ve been with your spouse for 12 months or 12 years, it’s important to keep appreciating one another for the things you both do.
7. Social Media interference
In a world that’s largely run by technology, it can be tough not to get caught up with electronic gadgets. This is why more and more couples are reporting that their partner’s obsession with technology is interfering with their marriages.
These situations can replace healthy communication and even intimacy. It may sound bizarre, but they’re real-life issues.
Fix it: Take an honest look at your technology habits. If technology is taking priority over your marriage, it’s time to snap yourself back to reality.
8. Lack of trust
Trust is the very basis of love, and without it, a healthy marriage cannot exist. When a spouse cheats, lies or breaks a promise, it can really hurt the relationship.
Fix it: Restoring trust in a marriage where someone has been betrayed is no easy task, and both partners must be committed to fixing the relationship in order to have any success on moving past the issue. If the issues are not dealt with, the betrayed spouse will continue to feel hurt, anger, and suspicious.
9. Uncontrolled anger
While it’s normal for married couples to get angry with each other from time to time, it’s important that both partners act appropriately when these types of situations arise.
Fix it: Instead of reacting explosively with outburst or fits of rage, couples need to address the issue at hand (stay on topic), keep calm, and consider one another’s feelings. It’s also important that couples listen, openly express their opinions, and avoid defensive behaviours. If you have anger outbursts its important to look at it deeper with a therapist.
Have some difficult conversations if you’re having marriage problems. Nip it in the bud before it becomes real issues in your marriage.
Tune into to my Empowered Marriage Podcast to learn more. This fortnight’s podcast is available now and discusses this topic in more depth. 9 Most Common Marriage Problems – https://www.powerofchange.com.au/empowered-marriage-podcast/