Are you tired of bending over backward for your partner, only to be left with nothing in the tank for yourself? You may be resentful, angry and bitter and perhaps you are looking for different ways to change this.
If you struggle with how to self respect yourself and setting boundaries, prioritizing your needs, or believing in your worth, it’s time for a shift. How to self-respect yourself isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity for a fulfilled, balanced life. It’s a way of life, a way of being and it’s about making a choice to put yourself first and to stop being a people pleaser.
How to self respect yourself begins with 👍
✅ Make choices that align with your values
✅ Set boundaries without guilt
✅ Speak to yourself with kindness
✅ Stop tolerating toxic relationships
Self-respect isn’t about arrogance or selfishness—it’s about knowing your worth and acting accordingly. Ultimately it is about having self love for yourself. Let’s dive into six simple yet powerful steps on how to self respect yourself before you become too toxic to do anything about it:
1. Define Your Core Values
Self-respect starts with clarity. If you don’t know what you stand for, others will decide for you.
Exercise:
- Write down five core values that define you (e.g., honesty, growth, health, freedom, connection).
- How to self-respect yourself is asking yourself: Am I making decisions that honor these values?
- If not, what needs to change for me to be self respecting?
The more your actions align with your values, the stronger your self-respect will grow.
2. Set Boundaries Without Guilt
One of the biggest self-respect killers? Saying yes when you really want to say no. Women are particularly good at this.
This is especially common for women and overachievers—pushing themselves to meet everyone’s needs while neglecting their own.
Setting boundaries protects your time, energy, and emotions. You don’t need to over-explain or apologize for prioritizing your well-being and your own self respect.
Example:
“I’d love to help, but I have too much on my plate right now.”
Boundaries teach others how to treat you—and reinforce your self-respect.
3. Speak to Yourself with Kindness
How do you talk to yourself when no one else is listening?
If your inner voice is full of criticism and self-doubt, it’s time to change the script and learn how to self-respect yourself . You would never speak to a close friend the way you sometimes speak to yourself—so why is it okay to tear yourself down?
Try this:
“I’m so stupid for making that mistake.” → ✅ “I’m learning and growing.”
“I’ll never be good enough.” → ✅ “I am enough as I am, and I can always improve.”
Your words shape your reality—choose self-respecting ones.
4. Keep the Promises You Make to Yourself
Nothing builds self-respect faster than self-trust.
When you say you’re going to do something—whether it’s waking up early, exercising, or stepping away from a toxic habit—follow through. Every time you break a promise to yourself, you send the message: My needs don’t matter.
Start small:
✔ If you say you’ll exercise for 10 minutes, do it.
✔ If you commit to getting to bed on time, honor it.
The more you show up for yourself, the more you’ll trust—and respect—yourself.
5. Remove Toxic People from Your Life
You can’t build self-respect while surrounding yourself with people who tear you down. If someone constantly disrespects your boundaries, belittles you, or makes you feel unworthy, it’s time to reassess that relationship.
Ask yourself:
- Do I feel drained or uplifted after spending time with this person?
- Do they respect my time, energy, and decisions?
- Am I staying in this relationship out of obligation rather than mutual respect?
Self-respect sometimes means letting go of relationships that no longer serve you.
6. Own Your Choices—Without Apology
Self-respecting people don’t waste time seeking validation. How to self-respect yourself is a game changer. They make choices based on their values, not on what others expect. If you’re constantly doubting yourself or over-explaining your decisions, pause and remind yourself: I don’t need permission to live my life the way I choose.
Stand firm in your decisions. Whether it’s changing careers, prioritizing rest, or walking away from something that no longer aligns—own it.
The more you trust yourself, the stronger your self-respect will become.
Final Thoughts: Respect Starts with You
Building self-respect isn’t about being perfect—it’s about being consistent. Every time you set a boundary, speak kindly to yourself, or stand by your values, you reinforce your foundation of how to self-respect yourself. It can seem overwhelming particularly if you’re a people pleaser.
Remember:
✅ You teach others how to treat you by how you treat yourself.
✅ Self-respect isn’t selfish—it’s necessary.
✅ The more you respect yourself, the more confident, calm, and fulfilled you become.
Start today. Choose one of these six steps and commit to it. Self-respect is built one decision at a time.
